Getting Bi: Voices of Bisexuals Around the World, Second Edition

Bi+ people make up more than 50% of the LGBTQ community. Yet bi+ people can often experience isolation and invisibility–even from each other. Getting Bi addresses this by collecting 220 personal essays from 185 bi+ authors from 42 countries (from Australia to Zimbabwe). This book is a safe haven where bi people are celebrated and understood. Bi+ readers will feel comforted, heartened, nourished, and validated. You will find yourself nodding in agreement as you read. You will laugh at relatable experiences. You will receive validation about lived experiences you thought were unique to you. This book is a lifeline to those struggling. You will feel hope and a sense of relief. You will realize that, no matter how isolated as you are, you are not alone. You will hear many stories (which the mainstream leaves out) on the joys of being bisexual. Authors discuss their potential to be attracted–romantically and/or sexually–to people with genders similar to and different from their own. They describe liking, having feelings for, and falling in love with others. Many relate their identity to knowing who they desire, are interested in, and have crushes on. Therefore, many knew who they were bi long before they started dating. Others may never date more than one gender, but accept being bi as crucial to who they are. Each author questioned and subsequently arrived at a greater understanding of their sexuality. So these stories are helpful for anyone undergoing an identity exploration. Authors also bare their souls while processing feelings of anger, angst, doubt, fear, frustration, guilt, sadness, shame, and just being uncomfortable. This book explores many common struggles of bi+ people: Authors describe dealing with external (or internalized) oppression of all types: biases, biphobia, bi-erasure, heterosexism, homophobia, stereotypes, myths, and general negativity. Authors describe repeatedly being told they are ‘confused’ or ‘going through a phase.’ Authors describe their struggles with labels. Many get creative and create new terms for themselves or use none at all (demonstrating the broad possibilities of self-identification). Authors describe the fatigue of having to come out, not once, but over and over again. Authors describe monosexual partners (and potential partners) who are insecure, feel inadequate, and fearful about dating bi people. Authors describe seeking refuge in the larger LGBTQ+ community only to realize it may not the safe haven they hoped for. After joining organizations, they have found the ‘B’ in the LGBT to be in name only (despite all that bi+ people have contributed to the movement). Instead of – or in addition to – trying to fit into potentially less-inclusive LGBTQ+ groups, these authors show that you can seek out and become a member of your own bi+ community which proudly waves its own bi flag. For those who do not yet have bisexual friends, this book offers a peek inside your own community. Reading about others is a great first step to being a part of a supportive and accepting bisexual culture. It will likely inspire you to network, find allies, and build a strong supportive social circle. You will learn about bi+ community leaders, activists, and conferences advocating for the interests of bisexual people. You will learn about bi people who, over the decades, have been organizing movements to fight for social justice, equality, and the rights of each one of us. Drawing from so many different people who have many decades of reflection, you can’t help but leave with a deeper understanding and eye-opening epiphanies. It will make you feel empowered and inspired to exercise your freedom of expression. It will give you more courage because of what others, like you, have done